


Armored Heart

by meesha1971



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, missing moment, season 7
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-18 18:54:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11880696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meesha1971/pseuds/meesha1971
Summary: Missing moment set after the end ofBury Me Here.  After Carol decides to move to the Kingdom, she thinks about everything that has happened and what wearing the Kingdom armor really means.





	Armored Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Just a slightly fuffy one shot written for a friend who's been disappointed about the lack of fanfics for Carol and Ezekiel. Hope everyone enjoys. Thanks to violetverdeau for beta reading this for me.

Carol washed her hands, carefully scrubbing the planting soil from under her nails, and then headed back to the room she had been assigned at the Kingdom.  It was a small room, sparsely furnished with a bed, dresser, and a desk.  It was essentially the same as Morgan’s room.  It seemed like ages before that she had gone into that room to ask him for the truth, but it had only been the day before.

So much had happened in so little time.  Benjamin had been killed.  She’d tried her best … again.  And she had failed … again.  Nothing would stop the bleeding.  His blood has slipped through her hands.  It all seemed so surreal now.  Ezekiel apologizing – _apologizing, for Christ’s sake_ – for intruding when Benjamin was dying.  Morgan storming out.  Morgan coming back to tell her what had happened in Alexandria, how he had killed Richard for causing Benjamin’s death, and then leaving again to go kill Saviors by himself.

She had never seen Morgan like that before.  He had always been so calm and steady – so sure that he could avoid killing anyone.  Rick had told her how Morgan had been when they’d found him back in Kings County, but she hadn’t realized how far gone he must have been until she’d seen him trembling on the edge of that abyss for herself.  She knew how that felt.  She had fallen into that abyss herself.  She wondered if that’s what Tyreese had seen when she had taken off, announcing she was going to kill people.  Just like Morgan had.

She had stopped him.  She prayed she had convinced him to stay in the little cottage.  She had found some peace there, and she hoped Morgan could as well.  Ezekiel had been right – as crazy as it sounded.  Even up to this morning, she hadn’t been sure, but after seeing Morgan – and seeing herself in him – she thought she understood what Ezekiel had been trying to tell her. 

She just wasn’t sure if she could handle it.  The fight was unavoidable.  She understood now that she couldn’t hide forever.  Negan and his Saviors had hurt so many already.  Tears welled up as she thought of Abraham – so strong and confident – and Glenn …  Sweet, lovable Glenn – always trying to do the right thing.  Neither of them had deserved to die that way.  Maggie didn’t deserve to lose her entire family, her husband, and be left to raise her baby alone.  Sasha didn’t deserve to lose another person she loved so soon.  Olivia hadn’t deserved to be shot to set an example.  Spencer had been a jerk, but even he hadn’t deserved to die so horribly.  Benjamin hadn’t deserved to die over a melon.  The waste of it all was crushing. 

So, she was going to have to fight again.  She was going to have to kill people.  She had made her choice.  Left Morgan at the cottage, packed her bags, and moved back to the Kingdom to help them fight.  And Ezekiel had surprised her again.  She had found him replanting his garden with Henry rather than making plans for going to war.  He had told her that he knew they had to fight, but not today.  Today was for tending to what he was fighting for. 

Maybe that was the secret that kept eluding her.  She’d never allowed herself to stop and think about why she was fighting or why she had to kill people.  She’d been so sure that the best way to deal with those necessities was to not think about it.  To not allow herself to feel anything.  Ezekiel was showing her a different way.  And he was probably right about this too.  Tomorrow she would go with Ezekiel and his regiment to Alexandria.  It was going to be difficult, but maybe it was time to allow herself to think about what they were fighting for.

The knock at her door shook her out of her reverie.  She opened it to find Dianne waiting in the corridor with a box. 

“King Ezekiel said you were joining us tomorrow.”

“That’s right,” Carol said, looking at Dianne curiously. 

“I’ve got some gear,” Dianne said, holding out the box.  “I wasn’t sure about size so I brought several so you could try them on.”

For a moment, Carol was confused.  But looking at Dianne, still wearing her makeshift armor, she realized what the woman was talking about.  All of the Kingdom soldiers wore armor of some kind.  Benjamin had as well. 

“Is all of that really necessary?”  She looked down at the box skeptically.  “It didn’t help Benjamin.”

Dianne winced, looking away, and Carol felt like the worst kind of asshole for saying that so bluntly.  But her eyes were clear when she looked back at Carol.  “It didn’t.  But it’s better than no protection at all and it … it reminds us that we’re not safe out there.”

“I’m sorry,” Carol responded, almost surprised that she meant it.  She didn’t know these people very well, but she understood them.  The armor wasn’t just a means of protection – however limited that protection might be.  It was a symbol that unified them.  “You’re right.  It is better than no protection at all out there.”

Dianne nodded as Carol stepped back to allow her to enter the room.  She set the box on the bed and started pulling items out of it.  Elbow guards, shin guards, chest armor – she laid them out on the bed and looked back at Carol.

“I know it looks silly,” she said quietly.  “The first time I put it on, I felt ridiculous.  But it did make a difference.  When I’m wearing my armor, I don’t forget that the dead want to eat me.  Or that some asshole might try to shoot me.  It’s not a guarantee that I’ll survive, but it has protected me.”

Carol ran her fingers over a piece of chest armor that looked around her size.  She picked it up, and Dianne helped her put it on.  It was surprisingly lightweight and comfortable.  But Dianne was right.  It made her feel more aware of what she was getting herself into.  Not completely protected, but maybe that was the point.  It offered some protection, but not enough to make her feel overconfident or complacent.  She found elbow guards and shin guards that fit and turned to Dianne, holding out her arms.

“How do I look?”

“Ridiculous,” Dianne said, smiling.

Carol found herself laughing.  It felt strange to laugh with everything that had happened.  But wasn’t that the point as well?  Wasn’t that part of what they were fighting for?  Life had to be lived.  Glenn had always said that he honored the dead by living because they didn’t get to.  Maybe he had been right as well. 

“Thank you.”

“It was no problem,” Dianne said, still smiling.  “King Ezekiel always takes care of the people he cares about.”

“He does, doesn’t he?”  Carol was thoughtful as she packed the extra pieces of armor back in the box and handed it to Dianne. 

After Dianne had left, Carol squatted down and stood, drawing her knife to test her movement in the armor.  It was comfortable and didn’t impede her.  She thought again about Ezekiel.  He was a man of contradictions.  Loving and kind, but strong and determined.  She knew that he had feelings for her.  She wasn’t sure what to do about that right now.  But he had helped her, and she could only be grateful for that. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ezekiel was pacing when Dianne came down the stairs.  He wasn’t sure if Carol would want the armor.  Or if she would accept it.  She had chosen to come here, and he believed that meant something to her.  He wanted her to be part of the Kingdom – to feel at home here.  But he didn’t want to be overbearing or make her feel like he was trying to force her to stay.  She had to know it would always be her choice.  He stilled when he saw Dianne, slipping into his Kingly persona easily.

“Your majesty,” Dianne said with a slight bow.

“How is Carol?”

“She seems fine.  We found armor that fit her well.”

“Good.  Good.  You have done well.  Your King is pleased.”

Dianne left with another small bow, smiling.  Ezekiel fought the urge to roll his eyes.  His people may not know that his Kingly persona was just an act, but he knew that he might as well be wearing a sign announcing that he had feelings for Carol.  It was a bit embarrassing that he couldn’t seem to control his reaction to her.  But it made him feel good.  He could live with a bit of embarrassment. 

He sighed as he made his way towards his own room.  Carol had intrigued him from the start.  Putting on her own act, trying to seem helpless.  But she was far from helpless.  There was an underlying strength there that he wasn’t sure she even realized she had.  She strapped on a gun the way other women would adorn themselves with jewelry.  And it suited her just as much as diamonds would.  He allowed himself a moment to imagine how she would look wearing the armor.  Fierce, formidable – beautifully so.  He wondered if she knew just how lovely she was.

But there was pain as well – deeply hidden, but still visible in her eyes.  She had suffered and survived whatever had caused so much pain.  Even as he wanted to bundle her up to protect her and soothe that pain away, he could only admire her for that.  There was something about her that drew him in even as she tried to push him away.  He would never push – never force – but he would do everything he could to let her know that, when she was ready, he would be there for her.  He could only hope that, when she was ready, she would return his feelings. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, Carol dressed carefully in comfortable clothes that wouldn’t impede her movements.  She donned the armor, chuckling a bit as she remembered Dianne talking about feeling ridiculous the first time she wore it.  It was a bit ridiculous, but it made a statement.  She had realized that she had been very wrong about the Kingdom and had underestimated these people.  They weren’t ignorant or sheltered like the Alexandrians had been when they first arrived.  These people hadn’t forgotten the danger, and they were prepared to deal with it, but they were trying to have a life in spite of it.  She could admire them for that.  And she would help them fight for it.  She could do this.  She wasn’t going to lose herself because she was going to try to remember what she was fighting for. 

She made her way to the front gates and found Ezekiel waiting with Shiva and a few members of the regiment he had chosen to accompany him to Alexandria.  She didn’t miss the gleam in his eye when he saw her, and she wasn’t surprised to see it.  She was getting used to seeing it – along with that smile that he seemed to save just for her.  She was surprised to feel her own stomach fluttering in response and the smile that spread naturally across her face.  It still felt strange, but in a good way.  She wasn’t ready for more than this – not yet.  But Ezekiel made her feel like she could be.  Someday.

“Fair maiden,” Ezekiel greeted her in his usual grand fashion as she bent to let Shiva sniff her hand before petting her.  “You look like a goddess of war.”

“You flatter me, your majesty.”  Carol couldn’t help but raise her eyebrow as she smirked at him.  She wouldn’t give his secret away, but she still found his act amusing. 

Ezekiel cleared his throat and tried to concentrate on the speech he had prepared as the rest of his regiment arrived.  But it was damn hard with Carol standing so near, looking just as fierce and formidable as he’d thought she would.  But more gorgeous than he’d allowed himself to imagine.  He focused instead on the people around him.

Carol listened and couldn’t stop smiling as Ezekiel raised his sword, his voice strong and confident.  The man was something to behold with his tiger beside him.  Without really thinking about it, she took point as they marched away from the Kingdom.  Nor did she give much thought to how the others fell in and automatically followed her lead.  It felt natural.  

But Ezekiel noticed, and his heart swelled.  He hadn’t asked Carol to lead his regiment with him.  He hadn’t expected her to do so.  But it felt natural – it felt _right_ – that she was by his side.  She marched alongside him with Shiva between, perfectly in sync.  Always alert.  Always prepared.  He felt his heart turn slowly in his chest as he watched his magnificent warrior queen lead his troops and knew he was falling in love.  Maybe she wasn’t ready to hear that today.  But in this moment, he felt confident that she would someday. 


End file.
